Saudade
by LettersToHeartbreak
Summary: I don't remember my past or name, but I don't care, all I know is that this world is peaceful. I don't mind the peace. [Oneshot]


**Saudade** **  
A Short Don't Starve Oneshot  
LettersToHeartbreak**

 **Warnings : Disjointed plot/what plot? Kind of Darkish/Depressing? I didn't spend time editing, look out for grammar.  
**

 **Summary : I don't remember my past or name, but I don't care, all I know is that this world is peaceful. I don't mind the peace.**

 **Disclaimer : I don't own Don't Starve. All I own is this fiction made purely for entertainment and not profit and any OCs not original to the game.**

XXX

I don't know how long I've been here. I arrived in the winter, and three have passed since then. I like the winter; everything is quiet when it snows. Peaceful.

I can't remember my name, but that doesn't bother me, it's not like there is anyone around who needs to know or can even talk with me in a full conversation.

When I arrived, all of my memories were gone; I couldn't even remember what I looked like until I looked into a puddle after a storm. I guess I was pretty. I had short spikey black hair that was kind of flat, like hound's fur almost but more windblown. I kept it in a ponytail to keep it out of my eyes. My eyes were nothing special although they did have a sunken look; I guess I never slept well before I arrived.

My clothes were standard, nothing special. Just black jeans and a navy dress shirt and some good boots.

Coming here, I was greeted by a strange man when I was barely coherent, but he didn't leave fast enough for me not to sit up and talk to him. He called himself Maxwell, and he was quite bewildered by my appearance in his 'world', apparently not having called me. Eventually he welcomed me and gave me a quick warning about getting something to eat before jumping through the ground, it was already getting dark by then, after all the drilling for information I didn't have. It was cold, being winter and all but some of his shadows stayed behind and acted as a sort of coat for me. Maxwell told me that because I wasn't a planned visitor I appeared at a difficult time for survival, not that he really cared but if I died before even starting there was no fun in the unexpected surprise. That was alright with me, I just went on my way.

I learned a little about myself after that day, although I don't know if it's normal or not. For one, hounds liked me. I think their supposed to be aggressive and try to kill me, but when a pack appears they just kind of sniff me before wandering off to kill something. None of the adults ever accepted any meat I offered, but one day a pup took it and became glued to my side since, the parents never batting an eye. I named my hound Bell, after she had particular fun ringing a random bell she had found, nearly getting us crushed when a foot came out of the sky.

A lot of creatures leave me alone in fact, at least all the ones on the surface as long as I don't provoke them, same with most of the ones underground. Tall birds act like I'm not there as long as I don't approach their nests and spiders let me harvest their silks from abandoned nests. Beefalo let me trim their coats, but more than once before its regrown and they get pretty mad. Lots of the nice animals are like that, tolerant, but not as accepting as the kinds that probably are meant to kill me. I have a feeling that if a creature were to kill me, it would be the nice ones.

I don't eat much either, although I'm always hungry. It's like my stomach is a hole, always a cold empty feeling. I've eaten so many berries that I've gotten sick from trying to fill that void, Bell was so worried she practically smothered me trying to make sure I was alright, covering my entire face and front in slobber. That was alright, she only meant well, although Chester was the same when I found him. Two worried animals could be overwhelming at times, if Chester could even count as an animal…

I never carried a weapon or tools with me either, because I learned that I could manipulate the shadows Maxwell had left me, which had taken to residing on my back. Bell and Chester had to collaborate to draw a very messy copy of the shadow's markings on my back in the dirt. It was very spiky, just like the shadows when they formed, although not really spiky either, just that quality you can't name that could only be the shadows. The center point of my spine was black while some 'arms' branch away like withering twigs on fire. When I call upon the shadows, they burst out quite dramatically into what I want. That is not to say that they aren't their own entity, sometimes the shadow acts on its own and wanders with me in the form of some animal, most often a catcoon and likes to play with Bell and Chester. The shadows like to whisper to me, and really are the only think that provides good conversation, so I call them Whispers.

I've wandered a good portion of the southern part of the island, so I'll head north. Maybe I'll find another human. Whispers told me that I'll probably scare them away before I can say anything about being friendly. When I look into a puddle I can understand. I'm absolutely filthy with so many things you can't see the porcelain nature of my skin. When the rainy seasons hit I made sure to stand in the rain using gravel to scrape away the grime. Whispers helped with my back, scrubbing it raw before they were satisfied. I did the same thing to Bell and Chester, and made a quick collar for Bell, who at this point had grown into an adult. We followed the Moose, who ignored me like all creatures have until we came to a huge wall. I was hiding in the trees as I watched the Moose try breaking the wall down, I was so shocked, but not at the same time when this man came running around the wall with a spear and beat down the Moose.

When the battle was done, the man was in such bad condition I couldn't just leave him there, so I had my companions help me get him back into his base, roofless as it was where he was surely safer. After checking him over, I could tell that he had been terribly close to death. Fever set in and kept him unconscious for a week after the battle. I kept him dry in a tent, regularly doctoring him and replenishing any spoilt food supplies he had. As time went, he just got sicker and sicker, and I knew that he was going to die if I didn't find proper medicine. Whispers, Bell and Chester had nothing though, all telling me that no medicine powerful enough to save the man was available in their world. I even went and tried to talk with the Merms, Pigmen, and Bunnymen. None of them could help, although they could have lied, creatures like them never seemed to particularly like me and always made me uncomfortable with their glares. After a while I went to other creatures. The spider queen, after communing with Whispers told me that my only hope was collecting every item with healing properties I could and creating a serum could I have any hope of saving the man, even giving me a gland as a start. I thanked her many times before doing just that.

For an entire month this went on, and the comatose man just kept getting thinner and thinner and sicker and sicker. I had to coax food and water in to him as gently as I could, Whispers helping me with the food, although water was something only I could handle, considering how fluid it was, too much for Whispers to contain. I was oddly determined though, going as far as to post Bell as a guard to keep away creatures that would want to harm him, which was almost everything astonishingly. Bell herself didn't really like him but listened to me anyways. Eventually, using the man's Prestihatitator especially I created the serum. It took careful procedure, but eventually I got something that seemed right. I had made sure to make note of everything I had done for the man, writing every observation down and every step taken for the newest recipe in his journal that I had found, using hardened charcoal as my writing tool. Praying that it would work, I used the healing serum with trepidation on the man. I almost collapsed in relief when color flooded back into the man's skin and his chest inflate in a desperate gasp for air. The man remained asleep for a good few hours after that, but I took that time to make some meat stew in his crockpots and clean any messes I had left. When he had stumbled out of his tent, I'm sure what he saw was enough for his response.

Bell, Chester, me and Whispers had all been gathered around the fire, talking among ourselves quietly. The man had nearly screamed himself hoarse, hurting Bell's ears and scaring Chester horribly. Whispers and I both had to cover his mouth to make him stop as I told him to calm down, although my voice sounded horrible with rare use. I only ever talked in murmurs at most anyways. Finally we let him go and asked his name.

Wilson. That was his name. It was a nice name, and made me feel safe almost, although I don't know why. When he learned about my missing past and name, after an hour around the dying fire, he finally said he was going to call me Wren. He said I reminded him of the little birds back at his old mountain home because of how small they were. I went along with it; names had never really mattered to me, when I went without one for so long.

As a year went by, I had learned that Wilson was scientist, and as such he had taken great pleasure in studying me, theorizing why this world reacted so differently to me than to him and why I never seemed bothered by anything. I had to remind him that many creatures he was comfortable with made me _un_ comfortable because they always glared. Gradually, my creatures began to like Wilson, Bell becoming a puppy all over again when Wilson gave her a jerky as a treat for something. What struck me though was while Bell and I got along astonishingly well, Wilson and Chester was also a good pair. I gave Chester to Wilson because of this, nearly being crushed when both gave me a dogpile hug.

Our peaceful lives were not to last though. Everything changed when we found Maxwell's door. Wilson wanted to go in immediately to find Maxwell and beat him at his own game, but I had this feeling, a horrible gut wrenching feeling that told me never to let my companion through that door, so I didn't.

I went through myself, making it impossible for anyone to follow.

I was alone for so long, going through every challenge just to find Maxwell, surviving easily just as I had always, but so lonely. No one was with me but Whispers, my only companion who led me to every door I sought in our silent march and search. The passive animals before now ran from me, or tried to attack, and the daylight had soon grown to hurt my eyes. I found solstice in the night, led only by torch fire to keep away Charlie, a monster that could never be seen but most certainly was there. Whispers told me Charlie's name and only that their origin was like every humans who had come to this world of shadows. It was so sad, so during the nights, I spent the sleepless hours talking into the darkness, listening for a hound's company and saying nonsense to Charlie. Charlie never said anything but I could sense them.

Many days, weeks and perhaps months have passed since I entered this challenge, just to prevent Wilson from going through it, and now I sat before the last door that separated me and Maxwell.

I was scared of what would happen, yet the shadows around me coaxed me and gently promised a peaceful life if I were to finish this last hurdle, promising me the ability to send Wilson back to the human world, to his home. The home I couldn't remember. Did I even have parent there? Friends? What was my original name? Or maybe I wasn't a part of that world, maybe I had been born of this one.

The shadows cloaked around me in acceptance at this, telling me that they didn't care about where I came from only that they loved me. I liked that, maybe I wasn't alone. So I went through the door, and watched as one man went free, only to be replaced by me.

I accepted my fate, because I knew it would come to this. This was not a game to be won after all, only a looping cycle where no one truly beat the system.

Once I ascended the throne, the world Maxwell had crafted so beautifully stilled, so quietly did things breathe as they looked to the sky as if they could see me. The monsters that had accepted me purred praise and welcome, and the creatures who tolerated me only bowed their heads in acceptance, finally. Wilson was caught confused in all of this, as monsters of all kind gathered around his base, because this is where my first appearance as the new queen would be.

Through a portal I appeared before Wilson and explained what had happened. Wilson had been furious for my actions, leaving him alone without warning like I had. I only explained calmly that if he had been the one to walk the doors, than he would have become trapped on the throne just as Maxwell had, never to taste freedom again. I took the time to explain how this world survived, saying that one day, I too would be forced to draw new humans into the shadow's world just as we had so that this world may continue a few decades after this day. He was not happy, in fact furious, spitting fire and shouting at the sky and shadows for everything they had done. It was Whispers, or perhaps all of the shadows now at my command, who explained that I was the first queen that had fit so perfectly and may be their last if I truly liked my post. I did, because now I knew who I was.

I never told Wilson what I remembered now, only sending him back to his mountain home, Chester and Bell both with him as companions to let him know that his nightmares were not a sign of insanity. To other humans if they were to see the canines of the shadow worlds, they would only appear as normal dogs. Through these two wonderful creatures who had become good friends, I was able to communicate with Wilson once between countless years.

Wilson had grown older without me, and had subtly written stories published in the human world to warn of the shadow world's system, to I was alright with. His stories of horror, insanity and starvation had put the world into a boom and he finally had achieved the recognition he deserved as a true scientist, not of new arts, but of survival.

I watch the world of humans go by in flashes as I slowly reshaped the shadow world, creating scenes of my remembered life to watch like a film I felt so detached from. I knew my old life now, but I liked my new one better. So I gradually forgot what I had remembered.

* * *

 **Wren**

 **The Lonely One**

"I can't remember who I am, but I don't think it matters"

*Her sanity is nearly un-effectible unless approached by passive creatures such as Pigmen or Bunnymen who only display tolerance towards her, making her uncomfortable

*Can befriend and communicate with aggressive mobs, especially hounds that can come to adore her

*All stats are stable but Wren does not hit hard and is better at avoiding fights by running away

XXX

 **A/N: Do I know what this is? Not really, this just kind of wrote itself because why the fuck not, I needed to write something besides the very long AoT story I've writing to finish before posting which I will do, don't worry. Anyways I just made Wren up on the spot, wanting to come up with a character to use for this story. If she were to be made as a character mod (Although there is already a Wren but there are only so many 'W' names; in which by the way, what is with Don't Starve and names that start with W? I just went along with it here.) Wren would be a very melancholic character, and while at first she would seem op considering her abilities to not be immediately attacked by normally aggressive mobs and impeccable sanity, she is actually pretty weak in health and hit- displayed when she hung back from the Moose fight. Think of her as a wandering ghost really. There with no really rhyme or reason until she found her place on the throne where she found acceptance with the shadows.**

 **I'm not sure that this story even makes sense… Sorry if it doesn't ^^; criticize or praise as you want! Sorry for going on hiatus, but I've been busy with the social life my friends have 'forced' me to have.  
**


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